aah, bologna!

“Bah Humbug” was already taken and, besides, I was looking for a better fit. Since eating, or over-eating, is a central theme that so well applies to the next several weeks, do you ever consider that maybe we also “overstuff” on things besides food? It seems to me that we engage in that behavior so much that it’s difficult to digest the real meaning of the season. Take the following for example.

First, there are the Travel, Crowds, and Spending. Maybe you happen to be one of those who can’t get into the spirit without the holiday crowds, or a trip to Aunt Suzie’s, or without spending a little extra money. But hopefully you’re not one of those who, come January, experience anxiety and depression over the most recent credit card meltdown that you promised yourself not to do again this year. If only you could lose your appetite prior to partaking of such an excessively hearty meal.

Unrealistic Expectations are another dish that’s quite often hard to swallow. They come from all directions; our spouse, our children, our parents and other family members; church, school, the workplace; and even ourselves. And, of course, there’s the media blitz about what we’re supposed to think and how we’re supposed to feel. If you’re not careful, you become sandwiched between what others expect and what, realistically, you think you can manage.

Do you have Previously Strained Relationships that don’t seem to get any better in spite of the holiday best wishes? Believe it or not, most of us do and what we learn year after year is that this is not the time to magically expect that everyone else will get over their hard feelings and resentments just because we have figured out how to take the right combination of Tums and Prilosec to treat whatever has created our own psychic indigestion. (I do hope I can remember that next year.)

If yours is one of the millions of Blended Families in this country, a seven course meal wouldn’t even begin to represent the many challenges that you face this time of year. Sometimes it feels that the only real winners are the little children who have figured out that separation, divorce, and remarriage mean they get presents from at least a dozen more directions than they ever dreamed possible. Did someone mutter the word, “bribe”?

So is there any way to avoid this annual overstuffing? Maybe several ways, in fact. To begin with, set some limits on the travel, crowds, and spending. Talk to others about your decisions and enlist their help in sticking to your good intentions. Second, as your grandmother always told you, get enough rest, good nutrition, and a little bit of exercise. Learn the F.A.C.T.S. about moderation—avoid too many fats, alcohol, caffeine, tobacco and sugar. You’ll be amazed at how much better mentally and physically you feel to tackle the demands of the day. Third, be realistic about relationships and don’t bite off more than you can chew. If you can, talk ahead of time to resolve some long-standing issues or to just agree to “keep it light” and not to spoil the celebration for others. Fourth, if yours is a blended family, consider establishing some new traditions as well as trying to observe some of the more treasured old ones. Make gift giving an adventure instead of a competition. Consider donating or volunteering to help those who are less fortunate. And last, but by no means least, develop and fine tune your sense of humor. If the holidays are supposed to be about the real meaning of giving, and joy, and blessing, then surely to Goodness, there’s a place at the table for the spice of laughter!!